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<nettime> Notes for a Liberated Computer Language
Alexander Galloway and Eugene Thacker on Thu, 21 Jul 2005 10:15:54 +0200 (CEST)


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<nettime> Notes for a Liberated Computer Language


backdoor TARGET.
Installs a backdoor in the machine specified in TARGET. If no target is
provided, the backdoor is installed in the local machine.

bandwidth AMOUNT.
Enlarges or reduces bandwidth by AMOUNT.

bitflip DATA, NUMBER.
Randomly flips a specified number of bits in the data source named by
DATA.

bug APPLICATION, NUMBER.
Introduce specified NUMBER of bugs into the code of the specified
application.

crash TIME.
Crashes the machine after the number of seconds provided by TIME by
interfering with the operating system kernel. If TIME is not provided,
the crash will occur immediately.

degrade HARDWARE, TIME.
Introduces wear and tear, specified by number of months given in TIME,
into specified HARDWARE.

destroy TARGET.
A quick and effective function for the complete destruction of anything
specified in TARGET.

disidentify TARGET.
Removes all unique IDs, profile data, and other quantitative identifiers
for the object specified in TARGET.

emp TIME.
After the number of seconds provided by TIME, this function sends an
electromagnetic pulse, neutralizing self and all machines within range.

envision.
A subjective function that helps the user articulate unknown future
realities. Often used in conjunction with rebuild.

fail FUNCTION.
Introduces logical fallacies into any other language method specified by
FUNCTION.

frees TIME.
Frees the computer from operating by freezing it for the number of
seconds specified in TIME.

jam NETWORK.
Sends jamming signal to the specified NETWORK.

lose DEVICE.
Unlink a random file on the storage medium specified by DEVICE.

mutate SEQUENCE.
Introduces a mutation into the given informatic SEQUENCE.

netbust TARGET.
Exposes a network specified in TARGET to extremely high voltages,
thereby fatally damaging any network hardware attached to the network.
TARGET can also be "self" to affect only the local interface.

noise PROTOCOL, AMOUNT.
Scatters a specific AMOUNT of random noise packets into the default
network interface using the specified PROTOCOL.

obfuscate SEQUENCE.
Render any given SEQUENCE (gene, character string, etc.) completely
illegible to all parsing technologies.

obsolete HARDWARE.
Renders any given piece of HARDWARE obsolete. Opposite of reclaim.

overclock MULTIPLIER.
Increase the clock frequency of the central processing unit according to
the value of MULTIPLIER. A negative value will decrease the clock
frequency.

processKiller.
Selects a process at random and kills it.

processScrambler.
Randomly renumbers all currently running process IDs.

rebuild TARGET.
Begins the process of rebuilding the object or scenario specified in
TARGET. Often used to remedy the effects of destroy.

reclaim HARDWARE.
Rescues any given piece of HARDWARE from obsolescence. Opposite of
obsolete.

reject.
A subjective function that heightens the user's desire to rebuff the
current state of affairs. Often used as a precursor to destroy.

reverseEngineer TARGET.
If object specified in TARGET is an application, this function
decompiles the application and returns commented source code. If the
object specified in TARGET is a protocol, this function returns an
RFC-like document describing the protocol.

rewrite APPLICATION.
Develop an entire new version upgrade for the piece of software
designated in APPLICATION. The upgrade would be optimized for only the
most startling and utopian developments.

scramble DEVICE.
Randomly shuffle all filenames on the storage medium specified by
DEVICE.

selfDestruct.
Imposes fatal physical damage on self. Equivalent to destroy SELF.

struggle.
A subjective function that assists the user in agitation and opposition
to existing exploitation and control.

zapMemory.
Clears all RAM on local machine.




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