Bruce Sterling on Mon, 6 Jan 2003 06:47:13 +0100 (CET) |
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<nettime> Fwd: Bush II Never President, Historians Conclude |
*He's a genius -- bruces Begin forwarded message: > From: "futurefeedforward" <fff@futurefeedforward.com> > Date: Sun Jan 5, 2003 16:13:25 US/Central > To: bruces@well.com > Subject: Bush II Never President, Historians Conclude > > > January 13, 2081 > > Bush II Never President, Historians Conclude > > WASHINGTON DC--In the most recent issue of the Proceedings > of the Archivist of the United States, a crack team of > historians lead by Harvard Professor Emeritus Ruth Ascidy > announced the conclusion of a sixteen year study of the 43rd > U.S. President during which the team determined "to a > degree approaching absolute historical certainty" that > "the 43rd President of the United States was not, as > supposed by some popular conspiracy theories, George W. > Bush." > > The study, commissioned jointly by the Office of the > Archivist and the Smithsonian Institute's Committee on > Special Inquiries, aims to put to rest decades of > speculation about the actual identity of the 43rd > President. "Gore's presidency has been a hotly disputed > issue in the popular media," explains Professor Ascidy. > "And, though theories claiming a Bush presidency have not > been taken seriously among academic historians, the > Committee felt that the 'Bush question' should be put to > rest once and for all." > > Based on more than 1,300 interviews with surviving > eyewitnesses and exhaustive searches of media archives in > 23 countries and 48 languages, the study concludes that > there is "overwhelming and incontrovertible evidence > favoring the majoritarian view" that Gore was the 43rd > President. "We found that claims by Bushites concerning > the number of extant reports from the period describing or > referring to George Bush as the 43rd President are greatly > exaggerated," notes Ascidy. "That is not to say that they do > not exist, but simply that the few that do exist can be put > down largely to typographical error." > > Claims about an "international, revisionist conspiracy" > to "paper over" a Bush Presidency with a "paper figurehead" > first surfaced in the work of Hugh Macadam, a self-taught > Illinois bookmaker and raconteur whose 'The First > President on the Moon' is a fundamental text for most Bush > theorists. Macadam's book publicized for the first time > the existence of a number of sources, in particular two > series of high school history textbooks, describing a > history in every way identical to the consensus history > save that all references to President Gore were replaced > with references to a "President Bush." > > "What can explain this substitution?" asked Macadam. > "This is not a 'Dewey Wins' situation. These books were > published years after Gore's supposed presidency. I'll > tell you what these texts are, they are crumbs of the truth, > evidence that puts the lie to the so called history with > which the Establishment has tried to dupe us all these > years." > > "The Committee looked in detail at all supposed > counter-historical documents, including those > emphasized by Mr. Macadam," explains Professor Ascidy. > "In every case, without exception, a much more plausible > explanation existed, including simple confusion and > occasional misconception among editors and typesetters. > If the massive conspiracy hypothesized by Mr. Macadam > exists, we could find no evidence of it." > > The study has received a cool reception among Bush > theorists. "It's a sham," exclaims Brian Secondi, > Executive Director of the 43rds, a DC-area group of Bush > enthusiasts. "It's really more notable for what it leaves > out than for what it resolves. Sure, they address some of the > publications, but they don't even mention the > well-documented meetings between prominent members of > the Democratic Party and Redroe Boudaine. This is no > regular conspiracy. Something of this scale could only be > pulled off through abuse of the revisionist, time-bending > technology that Boudaine controls. Ask yourself why the > Committee didn't look into Futurefeedforward and its > activities. I'll tell you why: A Cayman slush fund. A > hands-off regulatory policy towards 'temporal > networking.' You have no idea how deep this goes." > > Ascidy, responding to charges that the study is flawed, > dismissed speculation about the possibility of > revisionism facilitated by temporal technologies as > "naÔve" and "the product of imaginations that continue to > doubt the Apollo landing." > > ____________________________________________________________ > This futurefeedforward story was sent to you as a subscriber > to futurefeedforward. > > For a history of the future, see our timeline at > http://futurefeedforward.com/timeline.php > > For an archive of our stories, see > http://futurefeedforward.com/archive.php > > If you would like to be removed from this list, see > http://futurefeedforward.com/unsubscribe.php > ____________________________________________________________ > # distributed via <nettime>: no commercial use without permission # <nettime> is a moderated mailing list for net criticism, # collaborative text filtering and cultural politics of the nets # more info: majordomo@bbs.thing.net and "info nettime-l" in the msg body # archive: http://www.nettime.org contact: nettime@bbs.thing.net