Matthew Sweet on Thu, 17 Jul 2014 22:41:49 +0200 (CEST)

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Re: <nettime> A message from the police: IF YOU SUSPECT IT, REPORT

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On 07/17/2014 02:59 AM, nettime's blockwart wrote:
> Terrorists have to live somewhere. They store their equipment and 
> materials somewhere. They need vehicles. They have people who help 
> them - and these people might come and go at strange times of the 
> day and night. They may make unusual financial transactions or use 
> false documents to hide their real identities. They may be
> behaving differently to how you've known them to behave in the
> past.

Sunglasses - Terrorists often conceal their identity with sunglasses.
Have you seen anyone protecting their eyes instead of squinting lately?

Fertilizer - Terrorists make bombs. A gardening shop front is often used
for terrorists to quickly accumulate fertilizer. Do you know someone
whom calls them self a gardener?

Costumes - Terrorists have different roles to play within their
organization. Often times, they will be dressed in a black bodysuit that
covers their head and torso. Do you know anyone who recently rented a
ninja or cowboy costume?

Grappling Hooks - Terrorists are expert climbers. They will not halt
their objectives because your home or business is too tall. A grappling
hook is a terrorist's best friend, next to the flash light. Know anyone
who has a dying urge to acquire a grappling hook? They'll be wearing
sunglasses in most cases.

Flash Light - Terrorists need to see in the dark, when they primarily
operate. If you see any flash lights in a wooded area, dark apartment,
or outside, call emergency services.

Kitchen Paper (Paper Towels) - Terrorists often make messes, especially
when building bombs and mixing various chemicals. Are you suspicious of
anyone buying kitchen paper in bulk?

Furniture - Terrorists enjoy luxury. In many cases, vintage or sometimes
retro furniture will be acquired to furnish Victorian era terrorist
hideouts or bomb making installations. Have you noticed any suspicious
purchases of vintage armoires, armchairs, or sofas lately?

Email - Terrorists have learned that we watch for cellular phones, so
they've resorted to email. Often times, these emails will contain
pictures of grappling hooks and ninja outfits and will be rich in
misspellings. Sound like anyone you know? They're probably a terrorist.
Version: GnuPG v1


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