brainstorm on 18 Sep 2001 12:17:14 -0000

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[rohrpost] [i love u] bande de cochons september 2001

Band-e de Cochons
Les Esperan-ces enfuit;
Le clou s'est percee.

(Band of Pigs!
Departed hopes!
The nail has pierced itself)



Dear pink of my mind!

Pathetic. For ages Ive been looking for you. Everywhere. I cant
remember when it began. Dont ask me where I first saw you. It might
have been the tiny lamp on an electronic toy I used to have as a child
to teach me arithmetics. 1+1=3 and the lamp shone up bright. Wrong, this
meant. Might have been my aunts lipstick, she used to hide behind the
bottles of antiseptic in the bathroom cupboard. She never wore it. In
secret, I did, of course. Or perhaps the high-heel, one chick threw
after me, saying that I had watched her private parts too closely. Was I
only there discovering, what I was to become obsessed with? Like you,
that shoe really sent the stars whirling round my head. 
Today Im careful. You still drive me crazy. Youre not in the sunset,
not in the stripes of my toothpaste. The places I search for you have
been getting freaky lately. It spooks the shit out of me sometimes. A
week ago I caught myself gazing deep down my own throat. The tongue all
yellow. No pink of you. The other day my eyes were glued to the TV
screen, staring at pigs backsides. One packed next to the other. It
could have been you  almost. My breath stopped and my hands shook. Call
me a pig if you like.Why not green like grass or blue like the see 
simple as that. It wasnt my choice. You gave me the eye. Special kind
of pink, my colour of...

In eye, for ever.

september issue 2001: "bande de cochons"

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